I've been doing a great deal of thinking about life---how I arrived at where I am, making connections between past, present, and future (even though the Tolle book says no, only be in the present)...
I gave up quite a bit to be in New York---a very comfortable life in DC where I was teaching, in a wonderful relationship---all things that most people wouldn't trade (sometimes I'm still not sure why I did). I don't know if I want too much, but I do think that I should try for it all. I still can't decide if content is a good or bad thing. Or even if I should call anything good or bad.
I'm not sure why any of us do anything any more. Usually, it's only a small feeling or voice inside saying move, go, yes, no. And maybe that's Gd somewhere within. So here I am. And I know, I'm lucky for as much as what is mine right now.
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