Today I got my teeth cleaned and cleaned my closet. No cavities and everything in color order. I realized I had twice as many hangers as I had clothes! I also got a shoe organizer so no more boxes and hunting in the back of the closet for the stray heel. However, some of my shoes are still too clunky for the hanging rack. Ah, the wild ones, they will not be contained. There is something to be said for being too loud, too wild, too brazen. Many people want to put you in neat little compartments, but I say rock on with yourselves pink Steve Madden mary janes and orange Mephisto all rounders. Walk loudly and don't care about the downstairs neighbors (lucky me, I'm on the first floor.)
Lately I've been thinking about shame and letting other people's opinions color how you feel about yourself. Most often we do this in relationships and many women often put the relationship before themselves. When you have to bend too much, it just isn't worth it. Then there are times when you should bend. It's all about balance, as I was reading in the latest issue of Latina at the dentist's office. The editor wrote about the importance of this for someone living in two cultures--how to deal with when American and Hispanic values clash and how to feel good about the choices you make. I think many of us often find our values and beliefs and various identities clashing. (A good topic for fiction, yes, even on break, I think of how every moment is a teaching one).
Caroline called and had lunch at Arucola--love being ladies who lunch. She shares my passion for passion. And my passion for the Mustard Seed (confirming a previous post about white chocolate, but then does that make her an oreo?). I think about the places in which we find comfort and find excitement in the ordinary. There are some people that grow with you. Caroline's one of them. I know she's going to be there through all this book business with me (in fact, working on some art for the cover) and tomorrow rocker/photographer/bartender JK is going to shoot some pics that may wind up on the back. Good thing I got all those new clothes from J's Hanukkah gift certificate and yeah me for organizing so I can find everything in a snap. And big Kool-aide grin b/c J knows what I like---he asked me to go to the open mic at Busboy's and Poet's tonight.