Saturday, September 17, 2005

I get 3 strikes and then I'm out

That's my drinking policy. Last night after 3 glasses of wine at Bardeo I took myself diagonally home. But is life about knowing your limits or pushing them? I think it's about both, knowing when to say when and knowing when when is a line you can cross. Someone who will remain nameless here gave me some of the best advice I've ever heard. He told me that failure is not failure unless you accept it as that. But to embrace it, in others and yourself. Me being the perfectionist, easier said than done. My grandmother's advice over the phone is a little easier to digest: Eat well and take care of your body. Today I went to pilates (but ate bread pudding for breakfast). I made the chocolate mint one that I mentioned in the blog in August. Great recipe--though I think I would do something about the presentation next time. Ah well, sometimes looks aren't that important.

And sometimes it is the contrast in looks that is appealing. One of my students handed in an amazing poem about that---takes me back to the days when I was a bit brazen myself and wrote a line that goes something like:

I want to be like those girls
who can wear a robe like a slinky
black cocktail dress
and suck a dick
like a parched beggar.

And hence that poem was forever dubbed the suck a dick poem by my friends. I often wondered if that line was too extreme and what people would think about me when I read it (the poem was not about any sexual experiece, but the whole idea of what connotates sexy and sultry).

I think my student did it better than I did--here are a few lines:

He says he loves the contrast
of his dark skin
To my milky white
But I think that what he really means
Is that he wants me from behind

The poem to me is about crossing lines, not just racial and sexual but that of limits and expectations. About taking risks--in thinking it and writing it and I'm honored to receive such a poem. It means there is trust. And poetically and in life, that is something so fragile and sacred. Trust happens after risks do. So here's my advice to you: eat some salad and then go out and do something brazen. Hit one out of the park for me!

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