Less: The New Year

I'm all about resolutions---I think it brings out the organization in me---I'm a compulsive list maker and love crossing things off. I'm one of those who thrives on being busy and always having something to do next. So my resolution for this year is to be less like my nature. Just a little though. I really want to try and relax or at least have relax be part of the list! I've been practicing that over break---been travelling and catching up with friends. Susan and Fritz introduced us to Franny's and it's now my favorite (in addition to Rose Water) restaurants in the city. Their bar menu is amazing---anyone know what kummel is?? Delicious, that's what! And when Susan spilled wine in my almost empty pasta, the waiter quickly came with Wine Off and a full new plate of pasta!

Today it's yoga and girl time with Brooke before we head off to Florida tomorrow! So there will be less of me online, and more of me poolside!

Tending Bar and Other Things

You'll find me at the Silverleaf tonight serving up yummy cocktails and soon you may also find me here and here! Not on Gerald Stern or Richard Peabody exactly, but you clever ones will figure it out.

A Shared Sentiment

The Jewish Christmas...

The Covenant: A Mini Review

My aunt bought me Naomi Ragen's The Covenant for Hanukkah. I was a little skeptical at first because of the cover design. A woman with a huge Jewish Star on her neck---I was thinking it was going to be more in the category of Judaica rather than Jewish art (the latter being what I find moving and powerful and the Judaica being more commercial and cheesy). Thank goodness I committed to reading it. While there were some passages that seemed a little cliched, overall, I loved her poetic narrative---Ragen knows how to weave in images to convey just the right sentiment. Her idea of wishing life was like a beaded necklace---if you made a mistake, you could just restring---completely apt and gorgeous. Her prose was especially stunning when describing a suicide bombing at a bus stop. She made the moment stretch on and crammed so much into a few seconds.

I'm hooked! Luckily she has 6 more novels for me to read!

Brooke came over yesterday and we made an amazing salad---homemade dressing with balsamic vinegar, olive oil, and pesto and she helped me sort out an idea for another story---I'm going to try and do some fiction over the Drisha break---seems I can only write fiction when I have long blocks of time on my hands---so I'm amazed at people like Ragen who can sustain a novel. I like to draft everything in one sitting---guess I will have to change that if I ever want to write a novel...

Late Blooming Fashionista

In high school and college, I was the girl who owned fifteen pairs of overalls and make up constituted that glitter goo for my eyes. I remember when I showed up to go out for the evening in overalls and Jillian set me straight, lending me her tight cords and doing my hair.

And now, 10 years later, I'm the girl who Sandra calls a "product horse" when we roomed at AWP last year. I'm not sure what happened---perhaps it was going to grad school in New York or never feeling like one of the pretty girls of the cool click.

I don't even remember when I fell in love with Betsey Johnson as a designer. She's quirky and weird and somehow a little classic and so it was a great Hanukkah present to get a gift card on Friday and the OCD me, was at the boutique this weekend and got these numbers. (though the blue one is just a pic--mine is in green!) One will be for Erin's wedding (see, totally not frivilously dress shopping!)

A Library of Brandy

(though I went for the bourbon!)

The Brandy Library--oh, you'd thought I'd forgotten, is one of the most beautiful bars I've been to. However since I am a writer and it looks like a library (though who doesn't want to cozy up and have a rare bourbon every now and again?) I was quite impressed. The service is amazing. I was lost as soon as I got out of the subway and immediately someone from the bar got on Jonathan's cell phone to help me out. They were patient while I was crossing streets and telling them what I was standing in front of. They recognized me as the "lost girl" as soon as I opened the door, took my coat and brought me to my table without making me feel embarassed.

The shelves have moving ladders and the servers climb up to grab your rare brown liquor and pour at your table--almost like wine service. The menu is a zillion pages long and so you can get quite immersed in reading---it's a place that I would keep coming back to just to try new things. I asked my server to recommend a bourbon based on my favorites, Woodford Reserve and Basil Hayden's. She came up with Eagle Reserve! And paired with the eclairs, I was in heaven---bourbon and dessert, not an easy combo.

A bartender must do her research you know. I know, even here, it's quite academic. I mean, anyone can pour a rum and coke, but to know all the proper glassware (I'm still working on that one), and all the nuances of the various types of liquors and cocktails, that's a lifetime of learning my friends. And I take my work seriously :)

As we were leaving, we were presented with a long, small box and was told it was for our breakfast. In the cab, we found out we were holding on to a box of biscotti in a blue engraved box! It was thoughtful without being overdone.

It fit all of my bar qualifications, classy (I don't want to be around annoying drunks or even well dressed ones either), solid selections, somewhere I could sit down and have a conversation and listen to great jazz in the background. I hate to say it, but I think it's my new favorite bar in the city.

You're no Fun!

That's what I was thinking to myself lately. I've been all work and no play. Well, not exactly, but I was realizing that I wasn't taking that much time just to be. Everything was always put in the planner, go here, go there, do yoga, cook, chores, write, Drisha, bartend, etc. The actual me time besides yoga, not too often. So since yesterday at 7 p.m. I decided to PLAY!

Brooke turned 30th and so we skated at Central Park. It's not that huge of a rink, but to skate with the city lights and buildings hulking over and the trees of the park all lit up, totally something special. And to watch Brooke and Meghan cram all their stuff in one locker, priceless amount of giggles! Then Jonathan and I headed back to Kitchen Bar where all the regulars were there. Nothing like Old Bays fries and a hot toddy to finish the evening.

Tonight we're off to the Brandy Library! Jonathan just made the reservation and found the place without me. I'm so tickled and excited to get all dressed up for date night. Will it be the stinger or fuzzy ruffles for me (those are the names of the cocktails!)? Stay tuned to hear more about tonight's debauchery!

And after a fabulous yoga class at good ol' LL, I met Meghan for lunch at Buddha Bodai and then headed over to Pearl River for some crazy shopping. I now have a purple dancing buddha for my dresser remind me to raise my arms up over my head and laugh. It actually looks like one of the postures we did today. A dancing something or other and I was able to hold a tree pose in handstand today for about 10-20 seconds! I'm not even going to attempt to find photos of what I did, but it was cool and I'm sure it will happen again so go to the 10 am Friday class if you want to do it too!

I'm relaxing, enjoying my jasmine tea and the new poetry prospects---I've only been chill and collected for 24 hrs. and in that time, I got an invitation to read in Oklahoma and to submit poems for a way cool magazine with a heartfelt and wonderful email from the editor.

Here's to your weekend! Go PLAY!

KGB Comrades??

Please join us for The Bedside Guide to No Tell Motel - Second Floor Release Party
Monday Dec. 3, 2007 - 7:30PM

KGB Monday Night Poetry Reading Series
85 East 4th Street., New York, NY 10003

Readers: Hugh Behm-Steinberg, Ana Bozicevic-Bowling, Bruce Covey, Jill Alexander Essbaum, Kate Greenstreet, Shafer Hall, editor Reb Livingston, Justin Marks, Gina Myers, Carly Sachs, Allyson Salazar, Evie Shockley, and Nicole Steinberg

Holiday Season

This time of year always gets me thinking of where I am in life and what happiness means for me---being able to define what is working well in my life and figuring out how to change what I'm not so sure of. I'm not sure why I'm already thinking of my New Year's resolutions---esp. since I just assessed my life for Rosh Hashanah, but it seems to be a theme---now that I'm getting older. I've always had a combo of laissez-fare and serious ocd organization. Not sure how this dichotomy works, but somehow it does.

So my questions to myself are, where do I want to be as an artist and where do I want to be as a woman. Anyone else care to share your answers? I'm feeling both young and old, successful and not quite there yet. Carla, my yoga teacher would say, yes, these things are normal. You feel your feelings.

I'm wondering if my problem is that I've never really clarified my goals. I want to write, teach, be happy and be in love and to be healthy and not have to struggle. Am I being too loosey-goosey?

Some of us at Drisha have been talking about how women treat/view themselves---how we often appear wishy-washy and apologetic. We begin sentences: I'm sorry, I'm not sure I'm right, but I'm thinking...

And I know I've always had a hard time even deciding what to order from a menu, it all looks good. And now even with my poems, I'm not sure where they're going. I'm posting a draft below. I don't want to talk too much about the new projects because it seems that once you articulate something about a project, then you lose some of the discovery. So I'm just going to keep on trying to feel what I'm feeling.


Thanksgiving

What if I were to love you,
transfer blood from one
to the next, then does one
have a piece of the other,
breath of memory or dream
walking down, an opera
coming in from the window---

my voice or yours? Do you remember
where we began, that first taste,
you sitting in your chair,
me, with flowers
in my hair.

How then, did it come to this?
You with your stone,
me with my mirror---

for these do we give thanks?
Put the story on the table
and cut it up. Swallow
and keep it down.

The bits of blood in it.
It will not be sectioned
like a casserole, sliver
of pie or moon, the children
banging their spoons.

Thanksgiving

sans turkey this year! My alternative is butternut squash pizza---wonder how many members of my family will try it! I'm from the midwest where poultry seems to be the standard dinner fare. My mom can make chicken a zillion ways and is a whiz in the kitchen, but my "no meat" often finds her stumped!

But regardless of the fare, we're all really celebrating each other and all the joys we do have. I have a lot to be thankful for, I am very lucky to have the family that I do, the friends that I do, the fellowship, apt. etc...

but does it get any better than this? Here's to you Moira!!! A hearty virtual Mazel Tov!

Weekend Palms

Tonight at dinner after the reading, the great swami MP read my palm. Apparently, I have a writer's fork, will not have children and will live to be close to 100. She read everyone else's hands at the table and was pretty right on. J also had no children on his hands too. Hmmm.

While I do believe in this kind of knowledge---a woman earlier today read about how the Turkish women in the village where she had lived knew she was having twins before American medicine was able to pick up on that---I'm also a believer in that nothing is ever 100%. Lines and people can lie. Though I have to say, I wasn't too shaken about the news. Even a certain someone has indicated that I may not be the right type to mother. I'm not sure what that type is, or really, how do any of us know how we will shake out in the long run.

I don't really think anyone could have put a damper on my weekend. This actually confirmed some of my own thoughts and fears about the future and the kind of life I will have. I used to think it was my feminist lit. course in college, but perhaps it was destiny in a weird form. Though, yes, I know you can be feminist, and a writer, and a mother and an artist and...

Reb is proof that one woman can do it all and we talked about how people are perceived via their blogs and how we all think everyone else has a fabulous life. And of course, if we're our own editors, why not? I mean, who really wants to read about my fabulous time of sorting the recycling and watering the plants? Or how many asses she wipes a day? She gave a fabulous reading and looked good in my panty hose! And we had a fantastic decadent brunch at Rose Water before she had to jet set back to DC.

And if that wasn't enough of a weekend, that only covered half of it. Saturday night I heard Pharoah's Daughter for the first time. I know Basya from my classes at Drisha, but to see her on stage was really awe inspiring. I've been realizing how amazing Drisha is---all the incredible women---I had had much trepidation about being judged and feeling like the black sheep, but these women are cool as hell.

And then the reading today at 440 gallery where I met even more incredible writers---it was the real deal, not people pretending to be hip and writerly, but the writerly I love. The ones who really mean it, the people who open up their lives, our lives and help us to see the world from all angles. In yoga we bent our heads lower than our hearts so that we honor the feeling part of us, rather than the thinking part.

Carla tells us to be with our feelings and Reb tells me I blog too much after yoga that I sound like a new age chic. But whatever, her camera turned up and I was right so there must be something there right?

First Reading in the City as a resident!!!

JOIN US FOR A READING AT PARK SLOPE'S 440 GALLERY!

WHEN: Sunday, November 18th from 4:30-6:00 pm
WHERE: 440 Gallery, 440 Sixth Avenue (at 9th St., F to 7th Ave.)
CONTACT: Brooke Shaffner at brshaffner@hotmail.com
Admission Free

WHO:

CARLY SACHS Carly Sachs is currently an Arts Fellow at the Drisha
Institute. Her first book of poems, The Steam Sequence, won the 2006Washington Writers' Publishing House First Book Prize. Her secondbook, The Why and Later, an anthology of poems that women have writtenabout rapeand sexual assault, is forthcoming from Deep Cleveland Press.

R.A. VILLANUEVAR.A. Villanueva holds graduate and undergraduate
- Hide quoted text -degrees from Rutgers University. Twice awarded a Geraldine R. DodgeEducator scholarship to the Fine Arts Work Center, he is involved withliterary outreach programs as a teacher of composition and creativewriting. His poems have appeared in Crab Orchard Review and RATTLE. AKundiman fellow and a semi- finalist for the 2007 "Discovery" / TheNation Poetry Prize, he is currently a MFA candidate at New YorkUniversity, where he serves as Poetry Editor of Washington Square.

JOLIE GUY
Jolie Guy, November's featured artist, is a sculptor whose works arecomposed of a series of lines, like a drawing. Each piece begins witha piece of paper cut into a single line, to which other lines areadded. Each line is cut by hand. With each cut, the paper gentlyarches. Each new line of paper is placed on top of the previous lines,resting on, and sometimes threading within, these, to form a pile. Theearliest of these sculptures utilized collected paper tags fromcandies. A subsequent series investigated the building up of lines ofonly one color. In this most recent work, different colored papers aremixed, affecting the weight, lightness, and temperature of each form.

About 440 Gallery: Park Slope's only artist-run gallery, a jewel boxspace offering an alternative venue for nine Brooklyn artists. 440Gallery seeks to present surprising, unexpected art to the communitythrough exhibitions, talks, readings and events centered around directcontact with the artist. Open Thursdays and Fridays from 4-7 pm, andSaturdays and Sundays from 12-6 pm, or by appointment.

Accidental Meat

Last night I almost had meat again. It was a misorder on my part. I didn't read the first line of the dish---pancetta in the pumpkin pasta. It sounds like some crazy alliterative cook's concoction. Luckily, Jonathan had ordered the fish and so we traded! What a prince! Ramona was batting her eyelashes all night. Maybe I should lay off the old fashioned--all that chai infused bourbon went straight to my head!

Luckily, I came out unscathed and we got to see Natalie after her reading at Bluestockings. She is such a champ--coming into the city for the reading and taking the early am train so she can be back at her desk this morning (I'm in my pjs writing this). I always knew she was an amazing person and poet, but something about holding the anthology that features her along with 35 other amazing women, made me realize how lucky I am to call her a friend.

Since I arrived too late to even fit in the door for her actual reading, I sat in Starbucks and proofed the bluelines for my anthology and should hopefully finish that up this morning. The t-shirts that Kristina made arrived and I can't tell you how excited I am to see how all of this work is coming together.

Shame on me...

I realize I've been lax with the blogging. I don't know if it's because I'm adjusting to my new life here in New York and I'm not home as much as I used to be---so there's less time of day that I'm actually online and I'm wondering if maybe I'm getting less interesting as I find myself struggling about things to write about. Or maybe it's just that so much is happening in my life, I haven't quite caught up with myself. This month's theme at Jaya is about binding and release and as usual, it got me thinking about my own life and how I'm often very hard on myself. I get very focused and it's hard for me to just be. I think instead, I have a lot of do. For example:

1. I start bartending this week at The Silverleaf Tavern. Back to work for Uncle Kimpton, even though I'm only a fill in.

2. Found out that Nextbook will be taking 3 poems (and getting paid for them!) Their poetry section will be new and hopefully up on the web soon.

3. Cut down my lecture classes at Drisha so I could focus on writing on Tuesday mornings and Fridays (so perhaps more time online afterall...though I was very strict with myself on Friday and did all my AWP applications and submitted some poems and fiction)

4. The blueline is in markk's hands and so I'll be getting my copy this week and then it's officially to press for the why and later!

And there are two amazing readings next week:

~November 8: NYC Release of Word Warriors, hosted by Eve Ensler at BlueStockings Books. www.bluestockingsbooks.org

~FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 6:30 P.M.
Reception afterwards * Broadsides for sale

Center for Book Arts
Broadsides Reading Series
Poets Amy Lemmon and David Lehman. Organized by Sharon Dolin Suggested Donation $5 CBA members/ $10 non-members

http://www.centerforbookarts.org/events/default.asp#94
28 West 27th Street, 3rd Floor New York, New York 10001 (212) 481-0295

And going back to the bartending---found a great liquor/wine store in the neighborhood---and the shopkeeper let me taste some of his favorite vodkas from Poland. Elderberry and Honey! I have to admit, that even this bourbon girl went home a little happier yesterday afternoon!

Beauty or Braun?

I broke our ceramic trash can tonight, by just putting the lid down...quite a feat for someone 5'0"!!! I feel like the hulk in Joan's house...I'll add that to the tally of plates, cups, and blenders! Maybe I should be Blunderpants instead for Halloween...

Private Yoga Class

Well, not really...but due to the sucky weather, only 2 of us trekked out to yoga class. We were rewarded by getting to pick the cool poses we wanted to do and have much of David's attention. I was also able to get into a full handstand and balance for a little while! I know a true yogi wouldn't gloat about her accomplishments, but there's something about being able to do something that you weren't able to do very well before. Especially b/c I feel like at some point I want to do yoga teacher training.

I know, I know, when will I settle down and stop all this nonsense and get a real job. Truth be told, I hope never. I know that's a strange thought, but after a little soul searching, working, trying different things, you get to know what you like and what you don't. Besides bartending and being a professor, I don't think I've kept any job longer than a year. But neither has another friend of mine and he also seems to get along fine. He did point out that I will have two books out before 30! Too bad I can't redeem all those gold stars from grade school for cash because being a writer (at least not yet) doesn't seem to pay the bills as well as I wish it did.

Today I also got back in touch with a friend from high school who is also in New York. We talked a bit about the old days and my new/old friend remarked about how so many people are married and have kids and how there's not even a goldfish in his life. I told him that happiness doesn't have to be the way everyone else sees it.

My fortune today reminded me of that.

Something and Nothing

I spent the weekend doing a whole lot of nothing. Something I haven't done in a long time. I remember once telling a yoga teacher that I don't relax well---I have a hard time breathing and being still. I always want the wild poses. Being upside down, walking up a wall. Something that feels like I've accomplished something. But today Carla talked about everything being a meditation. From just standing still to picking out a cute outfit---everything can be a meditation. And that the most important part of our practice is how we take our practice off the mat and into our lives.

Mom's in town and she met me after yoga class for a movie. We slid over so that the older couple could sit closer to the aisle---no one else offered them their seats---not realizing that they wanted to be on the aisle so they could get up and go to the bathroom. We saw Tyler Perry's Why I Got Married. A wonderful portrait into the ins and outs of relationships. A perfect Sunday movie.

I think we've had one of the most relaxed weekend full of nothing with a whole lot of something.
And the big something is that the anthology is going to the printer tomorrow. I should have the mock up in a few weeks. So, it will officially be published in Nov.

And a secret someone wants to publish another book of mine in 2010! Looks like I've got to get something together.

Under the Weather...

I so so hate being sick! Though it often informs me of when I need to slow down and pace myself. I had to cancel my first reading which totally bums me out, but the upside is that I will most likely be able to reschedule and that two days off isn't the end of the world. Though when you're stuck on the couch, it seems like forever.

So, yesterday I was so happy when I got an email from Dan to let me know that his review of the steam sequence is online at The Growler!

And looks like we're getting close to go to print with the anthology---and Joan, my lovely land lady stopped over to visit, pick up some things and she brought me medicine from the pharmacy. Turns out our neighbor downstairs is sick so I'm going to drop off some non chicken chicken soup. I think it's working as I'm feeling much better...or perhaps it's the community and having people to talk to that makes me feel not as pathetic as I think! Perhaps mind over matter really does matter!

F Scott Fitzgerald

The workshop went really well---I even had some of the participants come up to me afterwards and thank me and ask me where else they could take classes with me. I was so honored. And I had been so nervous---not sure how people would take me, this young thing walking into the room. I've always been someone who gets funny about age. I think that comes because not only do I look young, but I act young. I still see myself as someone becoming who she is, someone who is a student, and someone who isn't sure of exactly what she wants yet---though I'm wondering if this is more a product of my personality rather than my age. Though, things are shifting. I feel a bit more comfortable in my own shoes after this, a little more on top of the world---though as soon as that happens, I always slip up. I've always told people, these things are like a wheel. I wasn't too happy with my workshop at the Havurah Institute, so it makes sense that this one went so well. Winning and losing always seem to be a balance, you just have to trust that the wheels will keep turning.

And speaking of slipping up---I've never been someone who jumps to join causes, but this little game will blow you away. Even with all the recycling and vegetarianism, I'm still not doing enough for the earth. Play this game and find out how you do!

OCHO #13 and Saint Ann's Review

The thirteenth issue of OCHO magazine is now available! As it was guest edited by Word of Mouth Host and Curator, Meghan Punschke, you can find new work from many of the WoM poets you know and love in print! http://www.lulu.com/content/1286797

OCHO #13 Features:- Cover art and Introduction by WoM Curator, Meghan Punschke-
Poetry by WoM Poets: Jefferey Morgan, Carly Sachs, Peter Moore, Matthew Thorburn, Eva Salzman, and Kate Greenstreet.-
Plus... Poetry by Laura Van Prooyen and Geoffrey Gatza.
And, the magnificent illustrations of Joseph Lappie.

What are you waiting for? Get your copy today!!! (Click on the link below to purchase through Lulu online)
http://www.lulu.com/content/1286797

~

And just found out that one of my poems from August was accepted for the next issue of The Saint Ann's Review!